Boku no Sendatsu Keiro
by Hatochan
Summary: A companion piece for Boku no Akaaka Hoshi. An autumn afternoon with Genma and Raidou...
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Notes**

- Thanks so much to everyone who read and reviewed Boku no Akaaka Hoshi !!!

- I don't think this is as pulled together as some of my other pieces, but hopefully it will be enjoyable, too. :) Hopefully...

**Story Notes**

**- **This is a companion piece to Boku no Akaaka Hoshi, which is set within the Tolerant Intolerance story. You don't have to read BAH or TI, but this story might make more sense if you did. And it would make me happy, of course :D

- This piece is prompted by the memory paragraph in BAH, when Genma was 21 and Raidou was 23. The paragraph ends with " The next year Raidou broke for the first time. " This makes them 22 and 24, respectively.

- Oushi- Bull or Ox. ANBU designation for Genma.

- Ohitsuji- Ram. ANBU designation for Raidou.

- Boku no Sendatsu Keiro- " My guiding path". Wikipedia article translates Raidou as " to follow blindly" and Namiashi as " at a walking pace", so I twisted that into a sappy title, the same as BAH ( which translates to " My bright star") .

**Warnings: **Coarse language, shounen-ai, sad stuff, sexual situation ( no details) etc.

**Disclaimer: **Naruto and its characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto.

**Boku no Sendatsu Keiro**

_I'm his best friend. I should have been paying attention all this time... 11... 12 ...13... _Genma flies through the forest canopy, counting each leap as he goes. It is 31 leaps from the secret ANBU training ground to the public training grounds on the western side of Konoha. His breathing is loud in his own ears, echoing off the porcelain Oushi mask and bouncing back in harsh pants. The run is not difficult; Genma is panicked. He tries to push the fear and guilt and desperation to the back of his mind as he jumps from branch to branch, zori hardly touching the rough bark before launching again. Bright afternoon sunshine trickles through the thick foliage. It is a beautiful autumn day. _I should have been prepared for this._

He remembers seeing Raidou at the academy when he was ten-years-old and Raidou was twelve. Genma had been staring out the window during class, completely uninterested in the lecture on shuriken safety, when the dark headed boy appeared on the school's training field with the rest of the third year class. The twelve-year-olds were practicing defense skills, separated into groups of four; two attackers, one defender, one client. The brunette was the defender. Genma watched in awe as the pre-genin gracefully deflected every attack made on himself and his client. The boy far outmatched everyone in his class. Genma mentally vowed to outdo him.

Several shinobi are at his heels, silent as ghosts in the shadows. A jounin on lunch break with his civilian girlfriend, two chuunin working on summoning jutsus near the lake. The three shinobi left their previous activities and followed Genma as ordered, the civilian girl running back to the village to alert the hospital. The small group runs swiftly towards the training fields. Massive explosions rock the ground, vibrating through the roots into the trunks and along the branches the shinobi are traveling. Already Genma can feel the heat and small debris blowing on the wind, his mask blocking most of the irritants. He is the only ANBU member present and he hopes the other three ninja have cloth masks or bandanas or something to filter the air to their noses. If it's this bad so far away from the source, he knows when they reach the scene the air will be nigh impossible to breathe properly. ... _16 ... 17 ...18..._

He remembers when Raidou was fifteen and he was thirteen. The honey haired teen had had way too much sake to drink and he couldn't remember how he'd gotten into the bar in the first place, or how he'd managed to end up in one of the back rooms with a woman who was easily ten years his senior. He did remember the mind blowing sensations. And to use a condom. Afterwards the woman had given him a peck on the cheek and a pat on the crotch before disappearing back into the dim throngs of drunken revelers. Genma fled the bar without even properly fastening his pants. He made it to the Namiashi resdidence without incident, sat on Raidou's bed and delighted in the older boy's obvious discomfort with his story, giggling whispers until the sun broke over the horizon.

_I shouldn't have let him train without me. I should've been there with him. Maybe I could've sto- _Genma nearly trips over a blur of reddish brown fur as he lands on a thick branch of oak. He looks down through the narrow eye slits and just barely identifies a squirrel tail streaking between his legs. It is the first of many. Genma is suddenly bombarded by a variety of woodland creatures; squirrels, chipmunks, birds of every size and description. He can see deer, rabbits and other small animals running fifty meters down on the forest floor. They are fleeing the chaos that is still several kilometers away. The senbon shinobi dodges the wildlife scrambling to escape and pushes more chakra into his feet, quickening his pace. He silently chants Raidou's name in prayer. It helps to tune out the shrill cries and rough screams coming from up ahead, mingling with the deafening explosions.

He remembers when Raidou hadn't quite turned seventeen and he was fifteen. Genma was pulled from a D-rank mission and sent to the Hokage's office. He was given two letters, two sets of dog tags and Sandaime's condolences. The two weeks that followed were a blur of well wishers and official meetings and long hours of staring silently out Raidou's bedroom window that ended when he found himself in front of the memorial stone on a rainy morning. He had sex with Raidou the next day, on the brunette's birthday. Genma gazed blankly at the ceiling while his friend's hot tears rolled across his bare chest. He spoke softly to Raidou until the older teen fell asleep.

The training field is coming up, partially obscured by clouds of dirt and smoke that rise to make a hazy sun then settle to coat everything with a thick layer of grime. Genma can smell charred timber and burnt ozone. His path has almost cleared of small mammals, only a few birds flapping by his covered face. _...26...27..._ The next leap will place him on---. Genma claws frantically for a branch to keep him from falling very very far to the ground below. His fingers catch on a fir limb and he saves himself from a headlong plunge. Long emerald needles scratch his mask. _ Where's the rest of the forest?_ Like every Konoha shinobi, Genma knows these woods like the back of his hand and he knows that there should be another three jumps before they reach the training field. Should be, but is no longer.

He remembers when Raidou was twenty and he was eighteen. Kyuubi attacked Konoha and Genma had made tokubetsu jounin rank on the battle field. He stood beside Raidou when he identified his older brother's body, a hand on the broad shoulder to support him when he handed the dog tags to his mother. Genma had readily taken to the idea of joining ANBU. He wanted nothing more than to stay close to his friend and become a better shinobi in order to protect him and his village. The tattoo had been painful. Genma had wondered if he looked as strange in his Oushi mask as Raidou looked in his Ohitsuji.

Genma motions for the others to halt and crouches on the limb to take in his surroundings through the dirty air. The trees are gone. The undergrowth is gone. He tries to locate the rocky outcropping that edges a rather large pond and delineates the southern border of the training field, but realizes that that is what the swath of muddy wood chips and pulverized stone two jumps away is. The entire area has been flattened within a kilometer radius with only a few piles of broken limbs scattered here and there. However most of the flora has been wiped completely from the landscape. The ranking shinobi can hardly believe that Raidou has done all this.

He remembers when Raidou was twenty-three and he was twenty-one and Namiashi-san kept hounding them to settle down with a couple of nice girls. Genma laughed at the thought of himself in anything that resembled a stable relationship, either with a male or female. He stayed out every night that he wasn't on or preparing for a mission, finding his way into one or more beds before the sun rose. Raidou had made a bit of a fuss over his wild ways, but Genma simply told him he was living in the now and seizing the day and whatever idiom his inebriated mind could come up with. Secretly, he liked the older man's concern, craved his attention. His newest best friend, Iruka-kun, quickly became a favorite with everyone, guys and gals, at the bars and clubs. The kid had latched onto Genma, and Raidou in turn, and seemed to thrive on the time shared between them. Genma had created something of a little family unit for himself.

There are two lighter spots amidst the rubble, slightly behind a tripod of uprooted tree stumps. A high pitched cry issues from the smaller spot. Genma recognizes them immediately; Nara Yoshino-san and her four-year-old son, Shikamaru. He has absolutely no idea what they are doing out here. Genma leaps from the tree to land with a soft thump in the debris and sprints towards the fallen pair. The small child huddles over an immobile body, wailing pitifully into the woman's flak vest. His once dark hair is now frosted with sawdust and weak sunlight. Genma and the jounin take up positions at either end of their temporary shelter while the two chuunin look after the mother and son.

The female chuunin, Genma met her at the annual jounin-chuunin party and he's fairly certain her name is Bachiko, checks Nara-san for injuries. The male chuunin, Bachiko's twin brother whose name Genma knows is definitely Benjiro, cuddles Shikamaru to his chest and tries to comfort the child. The jounin he's never spoken to but knows is a Hyuuga due to his pale eyes activates his Byakugan and peers through the twisted roots of the stump barricade. Genma peers over the stumps. He is momentarily blinded by a blast of soil and bedrock. Genma ducks back down in time to see the twin shinobi lifting the Nara family members. The twins have traded cargo, Bachiko taking Shikamaru while Benjiro has the mother draped over his shoulder. Genma jerks his hand towards the village, the chuunin dart off.

He remembers five and a half months ago when he and Raidou were ambushed and captured in Grass Country. They were separated and Genma's interrogator used a large variety of poisons that caused everything from gut wrenching nausea to intense agony flaring just under his skin. He didn't find out until later that Raidou's interrogator preferred more traditional methods.

The Hyuuga jounin turns to Genma, opalescent eyes staring over his hitai-ate that has been shifted and pulled down to protect his nose. Genma notices just how long the man's black hair is as it hangs to his chin and is whipped into his eyes. The man gives another glance through the dead wood, eyeing the disaster on the other side, then gives a series of hand gestures; his communication is clear, " _He's draining his chakra. What do you want to do_?" . Another shudder of the earth. Another cloud of silt raining down on them. Genma counts the heartbeats until the next explosion, his stare focused on a bare limb at his feet; it is blackened and gnarled, like dead fingers trying to claw their way up his body. Two and a half beats later the ground rocks again, confirming the jounin's assessment _He's draining his chakra. He'll die if he keeps this up. _This last thought has Genma standing straight up, exposing himself to the stinging cuts of flying rock and timber.

Genma sees nothing, the air fills with more opaque particles of dirt, the stumps vibrating. He wishes he had an ocular kekkei genkai, like the Byakugan. He is able to hear, however. Horrible broken screams that are seemingly torn from a bloody throat echo on the filthy air. He remains motionless as the clouds billow over him and away, pulling the curtain of haze from his view of the clearing. His breath stalls in his chest at the sight. A dark figure is just visible over the top of an enormous crater that lays at the epicenter of the destruction. He catches sight of chocolate colored hair before another wave of chakra and litter blocks his view.

He remembers five months ago when he and Raidou were brought back to Konoha. Genma stationed himself outside the brunette's observation window in critical care despite the protests of his own nurses. He was still recovering from the poison cocktails and the de-tox. Namiashi-san took his side. Once Raidou was moved to a recovery room Genma refused to leave. Raidou's burnt and bandaged body laid motionless amid the brightly colored flowers and get well gifts. Iruka-kun came by each day when his academy classes let out. The sixteen-year-old would sometimes bring his bag of papers to grade, sometimes he brought little Naruto-kun to play quiet games or to fall asleep in his lap with his fingers curled in the chuunin's shirt front. Sometimes Iruka came empty handed to drape himself over Genma's shoulders before he slid to the floor and rested his head in the tokujo's lap. Genma was thankful for the teen's presence, it made Raidou's silence seem less hopeless.

It is clear again and Genma motions to the jounin to stay put. He wants to do it himself, the jounin will step in if he fails. _I can't fail. I can't fail him. _Genma sucks in a steadying breath and abandons his secure spot. He runs across the decimated field, spying a crushed dandelion and a few blades of glass poking out of the litter. As he approaches the crater the dark figure gains more detail. _Raidou! _Genma pauses at the edge of the crater, stunned, as the world slows to a horrific crawl in his mind's eye. Raidou kneels in the center of the ruin he is causing, arms raised above his head, fists clasped together. Even without the Hyuuga clan trait Genma can see that the brunette is forcing what little chakra he has left into his fists to continue pummeling a hole into the earth. Genma thinks Raidou is trying to bury himself alive. An anguished grimace twists his new scars, wrinkled skin only recently healed enough to be called scars and not wounds. Autumn leaves in glorious shades of yellow and orange and red fall thickly around him, choking the very air he is trying so desperately to drag into his lungs. Raidou is surrounded by shreds of yellow and orange and red. The color of flames.

He remembers three months ago when Raidou put his feet on the ground for the first time since he came to the hospital. Genma had made sure he was there, not even showing up at the missions office that day. Raidou's mother, older sister and younger brother all stood around the walls of the small room while a male nurse arranged Raidou's tubes and wires and revealing hospital gown so the brunette could get out of the bed. Genma slid his arm under the man's unscarred shoulder and watched the tears form in Namiashi-san's eyes as her son stood on shaky legs. Genma felt like crying ,too, because he knew Raidou wouldn't. Raidou cried for others; never for himself.

The image of flames snaps Genma from his stupor. He braces himself with his own flow of energy, strengthening his resistance to the raw power pouring out of the brunette. One leap lands him directly in front of the distraught man. Genma catches the joined fists as they are on the down swing in one hand, the other hand grips a tattered sleeve. Up close, he sees the superficial damage done by flying debris; dozens of cuts and scrapes and bumps cover every bit of Raidou's exposed skin. One particularly nasty gash following the line of the man's facial scarring is spilling blood at an alarming rate down his chin. Raidou's neck is a waterfall of crimson. Genma feels the warm liquid seeping between the fingers wrapped around the other man's fists. " RAIDOU STOP THIS!!!"

Genma watches as Raidou's eyes flutter open at his verbal assault. The chocolate orbs hold no recognition for the honey haired man and Genma remembers that he is still wearing his ANBU mask; Raidou's mind is unable to place the red and white bull. With utter disregard to the rules forbidding the removal of his special face plate, Genma takes his hand from the man's arm and slides the porcelain to rest atop his head. " Raidou." His whisper is lost on the wind, but the dull glaze lifts from the watery dark eyes and Raidou silently mouths the other man's name in return. Chakra flow halts. Raidou collapses. Genma catches him and holds him tightly.

He remembers this morning when Raidou met him on top of the Hokages' Monument for a quick breakfast. The darker man had smiled freely at Genma's jokes. They made plans to go drinking that night, to celebrate Raidou's progress on the road to full recovery. The brunette swallowed the last of his juice, packed away the apple he couldn't quite finish, and the two men stood to leave. Genma put a hand on the back of the taller man's neck, tugging him forward for a kiss on the cheek before releasing him with a warning about overdoing his taijutsu training for the day. Raidou had leaned in for a kiss on the lips before pulling back with a brilliant smile. Genma could only smile back and wave as the other man teleported in a puff of smoke. His lips were warm for quite a while after.

_I'm his best friend. I should have been paying attention all this time._


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Notes**

- Thanks so much to everyone who read!!!

- Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed!!!

- I'm not really sure why I wrote this :). I didn't intend for this to be a two part story, but... I felt the need to write this little bit and I figured I'd post it since I'd spent some time on it. Shame to waste it.

- Enjoy:)... hopefully.

**Story Notes**

- This occurs two weeks after the events in Boku no Sendatsu Keiro.

- After going back over TI and some of the other pieces, I've noticed a discrepancy in the characters' ages, just like off by a year , sometimes two. Nothing that really affects the stories, it's just something that I thought someone might have picked up on and was like " That isn't right! He can't be xxx- years old!!!" I'm going to try to fix it( some editing) before I write anything else.

- The title " Raidou's Autumn" was the working title for BSK. I still really like it, so decided to use it here.

**Warnings: **Coarse language, shounen-ai, SAD stuff.

**Disclaimer: **Naruto and its characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto.

**Raidou's Autumn**

_I'm his best friend. I should have been paying attention all this time. _Genma sits next to the hospital bed and wonders for the millionth time since he brought Raidou in two weeks ago how he could have _not_ seen it coming. He faces the head of the bed, chair scooted flush with the frame, arm resting on top of the mattress. Fingers lightly grip the broad hand laying beneath his. The darker man does not stir.

Genma is aware of the two others in the room besides the patient. Iruka and Naruto-kun are sleeping in another chair near the window, the blonde child snoring softly in the teenager's lap. Genma knows without looking that Naruto-kun has his little fingers closed tightly about the folds of Iruka's shirt front and the dolphin's arms are cradling the small boy to his chest. The two have been spending an increasing amount of time together and the older man has decided that it is good for them both. Iruka has even spoken to him about taking Naruto-kun in, giving the boy a home other than the orphanage that mistreats him on a regular basis; he is going to put in an official request with Sandaime when he secures a full time position at the academy.

It is a familiar scene from five months ago when Iruka spent nearly every spare moment in Raidou's room with Genma. The tokujo hated that the teenager was missing out on quality sleep in his own bed, but he had been unable to dissuade him. He sleeps in the room each night with Genma and Raidou, leaving for his own flat in the morning to shower before teaching his classes. He's watched over the unconscious man the one time Genma conceded to go home and clean himself up. Iruka has become the other welcome constant in Genma's life. And, if Genma is honest with himself, he knows he would not have been able to survive the past six months without the sunny chuunin.

_We're all back in the hospital, Rai-chan. And we worked too hard to get out of here. _Genma dozes in the twilight. Empty bentos sit on the small side table, Naruto-kun the only one capable of hunger, greedily consuming the adults' barely touched meals ( lovingly made by Raidou's mother and his sister, Reiko-san) before passing out in his friend's lap. Genma opens heavy hazel eyes to keep his gaze focused on the bedridden man, the room, anything that will keep him awake. Raidou's tan complexion has dulled in the hospital, severe chakra depletion stealing the robust glow and turning his skin sallow. The honey haired shinobi lifts a finger and gently rubs the cool flesh laying motionless underneath.

There are flowers and gifts and knick knacks displayed about the room. A vase of sunflowers, large heads drooping over the mouth of the jar, sits on the wide window ledge. Izumo-kun brought them three days ago, sentiments from everyone in the missions office. A bowl is overflowing with an assortment of brightly colored flowers, Suzume-san delivered it two days ago with best regards from everyone at the academy. The exquisite ikebana arrangement that Hayate-kun brought yesterday stands out the most with its delicate stems of iris and deep green moss. Genma knows that Raidou's favorite flower is the iris. Many other beautiful arrangements decorate the otherwise dreary room, most from the Yamanaka floral shop, others handmade at home. Each one a symbol of support for a well liked shinobi.

Non-floral gifts have their places, as well. A love worn dolphin plushie nestles on the pillow next to Raidou's head where Naruto-kun placed it the first day he visited and on each following visit uses the stuffed animal to transfer kisses to " Rai-niichan's" scarred cheek. A note book, thick with handwritten pages, lays open on the small bedside table. Nara Yoshino-san came by the second day, looking no worse for wear, to offer the sacred cook book to the tokujo who had challenged her to a friendly sparring match for the prized family recipes. The tokujo who then sent her flying over fifty meters and gave her a concussion. Genma had to give the older woman credit; not many would be so forgiving of a concussion, even an accidental one. A carefully folded origami crane is tilted against the notebook, its rainbow patterned paper smudged here and there from the damp little hands that created it. Shikamaru-kun had accompanied his mother on her visit and handed the piece of art to Genma, all the while keeping his miniature figure between his mother and the man laying in the bed; as though Raidou would suddenly regain consciousness and attack. Genma had laughed after the mother and son said their good-byes, admiring the boy's protectiveness.

There is nothing from their fellow ANBU members. Breaking is a shared bond and nothing is needed to show their empathy.

The senbon shinobi brings his attention back to his friend. Genma watches Raidou's chest rise and fall with blessedly unassisted regularity. The hand beneath his is unbandaged; broken knuckles, broken wrist, broken skin, all healed without any trace of a scar. Normally the bone fractures would have been healed with chakra and the skin left to mend on its own. If one used chakra to heal every little scratch the body would forget how to heal itself, therefore, chakra was reserved for life threatening injuries ( which were often severe enough to cause scarring, regardless). The exception became injuries sustained during torture or breaks, injuries that would haunt the victim and bring nothing but further pain. These hurts are healed as cleanly as possible, with as little physical scarring as the medi-nins are capable. They had done the best they could with Raidou when he was rescued from Grass. He was simply in too bad a shape.

Now the man had, outwardly, suffered merely superficial wounds, his hands being the worst of it and they had been returned to their previous state of being only slightly marred. Genma especially likes the skinny line wrapped around Raidou's right middle finger. He put that there when the brunette had flipped him off during one of their training matches and Genma had almost taken the finger clean off with a razor wire. Raidou got him back a month later with a smartly aimed shuriken to the groin. Genma had fainted and woken up to a heavily bandaged dick ( only because Raidou thought the bandages would be funny, not because Genma needed them); the cut became a tiny scar at the base of his cock, usually hidden in the coarse curls. They laugh about it now, years separating them from the pain and embarrassment. Another life time it seems to the honey haired man.

_Everyone told me it would happen eventually. I just had to keep an eye on him. Watch for the signs. Watch over him. _Raidou's face is clear of the newer wounds, only his burn scars marring the brown skin. Genma looks at the sleeping face and tries to superimpose the image of Raidou before the burns, the tan flesh pulled smoothly over his cheekbones and neck. He remembers what his friend looked like, but he cannot lay the mental image over what he sees before him now. That other Raidou is then, this Raidou is now. Genma tries to remember how many pictures he has of the brunette pre-mission-gone-wrong. Maybe he'll make an album.

Iruka mumbles something in his sleep. Genma makes out the words " Naruto" and " ramen" then the brun falls silent, long strands of dark hair curtaining his face. The chocolate colored locks hang to the boy's waist, most pulled back in a low tail, the front pieces falling freely. Genma wonders briefly when Iruka will grow tired of taking care of such beautiful hair and hack it off to a more manageable length. He'll miss it if the teenager does decide to cut it. The older man watches Iruka until he is sure the teen isn't going to wake up anytime soon and turns back to Raidou. Genma wants the man to wake up, desperately needs Raidou to open his eyes and call Genma an asshole and punch him on the shoulder and laugh like nothing has happened. He knows that isn't possible. He'll settle for Raidou simply waking up.

He glances at the wall clock and realizes that it has been over ten hours since he last administered Raidou's unofficial 'medication'. As soon as he had finished giving the last one earlier in the day, Namiashi-san and her youngest son, Haruki-kun, had come in and Genma had shifted his seat to the corner of the room, out of the way. And then he had slept. He woke up when Reiko-san joined them with dinner bentos later on, and again when Iruka showed up with Naruto-kun. He missed Haruki-kun leaving for a C-rank mission and Reiko-san running off to tie up loose ends before her B-rank. Namiashi-san gave Genma a maternal embrace and peck on his honey colored crown before exiting the room in the twilight hours. She had two grandchildren to pick up from a neighbor's house who needed her attention while their mother and father were on missions. Genma promised to drop in and play with Reiko-san's kids...soon. He stayed awake after that, talking to Iruka until the teenager's doe eyes slowly fell shut and he joined his young charge in sleep.

Now Genma abandons his chair and settles himself on the edge of the hospital bed. He clasps Raidou's chilled hand in both his own and concentrates, centering his chakra and directing it towards his palms. He has been channeling his own chakra into the comatose man every day since he brought Raidou in, always after the medi-nins finish with their jutsus and treatments, healing the patient's fried energy pathways and depleted reserves. The doctor had told Genma that if he had not pumped his own life energy into Raidou as he ran with him to the hospital, the bear like brunette would not have made it; Raidou had used up every last spark of chakra, almost ending his life. That knowledge had caused Genma to empty his stomach into the nearby waste bin. But now he pushes that away as he focuses his energy into the brown hand.

A slow steady stream of chakra flows into the unused muscles and tissues. Into the arm, spreading across the chest and branching off into every area of the supine body. Genma takes one hand and slides it under the blankets, laying it on Raidou's bare abdomen, sending warm waves directly to his center. He can feel his chakra meeting and entwining and blending with his friend's. _Come on Rai-chan. Wake up, buddy. Doctor says you should have woken up by now. _Genma swallows a little choking sound that he refuses to dignify. He is a manly shinobi, an ANBU for fuck's sake, and he is not going to cry. Not until he gets home where he can hide.

_Honestly, Rai-chan. What is it about you that makes me a pathetic, sniveling crybaby when you're not even dead, you're just being an asshole who won't WAKE UP! _

A raspy breath issues from Raidou's dry lips, a grimace twisting his face. Tan fingers wrap themselves around the hand on his flat belly. Genma halts his flow of chakra, his own breath stalling in his chest, fingers splaying over the tense muscles. He remains perfectly still, perfectly silent.

Dark brown eyes hesitantly flutter open, black lashes stark against the ashen cheek. Several moments pass before they set on Genma. " G-gen...Ge...ma..."

The broken sound of his own name snaps Genma from his daze. He leans forward to bring himself more into the bed ridden man's line of sight and fiercely denies the watering of his eyes. " Rai-chan, I'm here. I'm right here. "

The hand on his grips mercilessly, far more strength than anyone recently comatose has any right to have. The fingers embraced in his curl over, the nails digging into his pale skin. Raidou's eyes are wide and frightened in his panicked expression. " Na-nar...Shika...Yo-ina..."

Genma tries to decipher the syllables rattling from the other man's dry throat. _Nana, shikayo, uhm... shika, shika, shik- Shikamaru! Nara Yoshino-san and Shikamaru! _" They're fine, Rai-chan. I promise. Nara-san had a few bumps and Shikamaru was perfectly fine. Just disturbed the brat's nap. Nothing more." He assures his friend, recognizing the look of guilt and fear in the sable irises. " They're fine."

And with that statement Raidou's eyes fall shut, his body slumping into the mattress and releasing all the horrified tension from moments before. The sight is extremely painful for Genma to watch, to see his friend's first waking thoughts are those of absolute terror that he has hurt someone. But he does not turn away. Raidou is his best friend, maybe more... and they share their pain.

The injured man's slight movement is enough to knock Naruto-kun's dolphin plushie loose, causing it to slide downwards and tumble off the pillow onto the bed. Brown hands release their death grip and Genma eases them back on top of the blankets, one of his own placed on top of the pile. The other pale hand weaves into the lanky brown hair, tousling it affectionately. " Rai-chan..." Genma trails off, not knowing what to say.

Another wave of tension overtakes the darker man, a ragged sob retching from between his cracked lips. Tears leak from under the tightly closed lashes. Genma quickly leaves the dirty locks of hair and wipes away the hot streams making their way to Raidou's ears and the pillow case below. The dark eyes show themselves again and Genma is struck by the unadulterated emotion he sees there. And suddenly Genma knows this isn't about the earlier anxiety over the Nara family. This is something entirely different.

" I- I was...so, " Raidou chokes, his voice almost non existent due to disuse and barely restrained feelings. " , so scared...G-Genma, so s-s-scared..."

_This is the first time he's talked about the torture. The first time in terms of what he went through. _Tears flow freely from the younger man's hazel eyes, Genma no longer cares who sees them. He renews his strong grip on the hands folded over Raidou's blanketed stomach and caresses the scarred cheek, thumb still wiping away fresh tears. " I know, Raidou. I know. " He sniffles loudly, remembers the sleeping kids, and lowers his voice. " I was, too."

" And... it hurt." Raidou continues in his hoarse whisper. " It h-hurt _so much_."

" I know. " Genma turns on his side and swings his legs onto the narrow bed. His bare feet wiggle beneath the heavy blanket at the end of the bed until his feet are covered and his toes are rubbing against Raidou's ankles beneath the sheets. An arm slips under the dark head, an arm slides around the weak body. Genma holds his best friend close to his chest, uniform shirt absorbing the frame wracking sobs. " I know."

For the first time Raidou is crying for himself. And Genma can do nothing, but cry with him.

_owari_


End file.
